Goodbye Earl

Mary-Ann and Wanda were the best of friends

All through their high school days

Both members of the 4H Club, both active in the FFA

After graduation, Mary-Ann went looking for a bright new world

Wanda looked all around this town and all she found was Earl

Well, it wasn't two weeks after she got married

That Wanda started getting abused

She put on dark glasses and long sleeved blouses

And makeup to cover a bruise

Well, she finally got the nerve to file for divorce

She let the law take it from there

But Earl walked right through that restraining order

And put her in intensive care

Right away, Mary-Ann flew in from Atlanta

On a red eye midnight flight

She held Wanda's hand as they worked out a plan

And it didn't take 'em long to decide

That Earl had to die

Goodbye, Earl

You feeling weak?

Why don't you lay down and sleep, Earl?

The cops, they came to bring Earl in

They searched the house high and low

Then they tipped their hats and said, "Thank you ladies

If you hear from him, let us know"

Well, the weeks went by and spring turned to summer

Summer faded into fall

And it turns out, he was a missing person

That nobody missed at all

So the girls bought some land and a roadside stand

On Highway 109

They sell Tennessee ham and strawberry jam

And they don't lose any sleep at night

'Cause Earl had to die

Goodbye, Earl

We need a break

Let's go out to the lake, Earl

We'll pack a lunch

Stuff you into a trunk, Earl

Is that alright?

Good, let's go for a ride, Earl

Hey

Yeah