Laid off

Given the sack

Let go

We are eliminating redundancies

Downsized

Pink-slipped

Shit-canned

We are reassessing our priorities

Pack your shit, skippy, and hit the bricks

Don't blame us now, it's just politics

Y'see we have a responsibility to our shareholders to meet this here fiscal deadline

Perhaps that will provide you and your children some modicum of comfort

When you're standing on the breadline!

We're planning a bold new vision, too

The likes of which have never before been seen

Our grand new future simply does not include you

As another cog in our machine

I'm sure you'll land on your feet

You'll find another way to cope (way to cope!)

Gak and smack and tranq on the street

Or razor blades and a short length of rope!

From the day you were hired

To the day you were fired

Your services are no longer required

Yessir, we revved up the chainsaw

And you're out of luck!

So we hope you like it rawdog

When you get you blue-collared ass fucked

Best of luck in your future endeavors

Clock out now

Clock out forever