What's the Use?

I have always been wily and clever

At deceiving and swindling and such

And I feel just as clever as ever

But I seem to be losing my touch

Oh, I'm losing my touch

Yes, I'm clever, but where does it get me?

My employer gets all of my take

All I get is my daily spaghetti

While he gorges on truffles and cake

What's the use? What's the use?

There's no profit in cheating, it's oh, so defeating

And wrong, oh, so wrong

If you just have to pass it along

That old hag is no use in this jip-joint

Not a sou have I made on her yet

And the one thing that pays in this clip-joint

Is my fraudulent game of roulette

Is my game of roulette

But I have to pay so much protection

To the chief of police and his men

That each day when he makes his collection

I'm a poor man all over again

What's the use? What's the use?

Of dishonest endeavor and being so clever?

It's wrong, oh, so wrong

If you just have to pass it along

It's a very fine thing to be prefect

Shaking down all the gamblers in town

My position has only one defect

There is someone who's shaking me down

Who is shaking me down

For this fellow unhappily knows me

And he's on to the game that I play

And he threatens to shame and expose me

If I do not incessantly pay

What's the use? What's the use?

Of this sneaky conniving and slimy contriving?

It's wrong, oh, so wrong

If you just have to pass it along

I could live very well by extortion

But I simply can't keep what I earn

For I haven't a sense of proportion

And roulette is my only concern

Is my only concern

I've a system that's fiendishly clever

Which I learned from a croupier friend

And I should go on winning forever

But I do seem to lose in the end

What's the use? What's the use?

All this cheating and plotting, you end up with nothing

It's wrong, oh, so wrong

If you just have to pass it along

Pass it along, pass it along

Pass it along, pass it along

Pass it along, pass it along

Pass it along, pass it along

Pass it along, pass it along

Pass it, pass it, pass it, pass it

Oh, what's the use? What's the use?

There's no profit in cheating, it's oh, so defeating

And wrong, oh, so wrong

If you just have to pass it along