Putin

Putin, puttin' his pants on

One leg at a time

I mean, he's just like a regular fella, huh?

He ain't nothin' like a regular fella

Putin, puttin' his hat on

Hat size number nine

You say that Putin's getting big-headed

Putin's head is just fine

He can drive his giant tractor

Cross the Trans-Siberian plain

He can power a nuclear reactor

With the left side of his brain

And when he take his shirt off

He drive the ladies crazy

When he take his shirt off

Make me wanna be a lady

It's the Putin girls

Putin, if you put it, when you put it, where you put it

Putin, if you put it, when you put it, next to me

Putin, if you put it, when you put it, where you put it

Putin, if you put it, when you put it, next to me

Putin hates the Putin girls

'Cause he hates vulgarity

He loves his Mother Country

And he loves his family

He and his ex-wife, Lyudmila

Ride along the shore of the beautiful new Russian Black Sea

Let's listen in

A great man is speaking

We fought a war for this

I'm almost ashamed

The Mediterranean

Now there's a resort worth fighting for

If only the Greeks or the Turks

Would start to sniff around

Oh, I'd bring the hammer down

So quick, their wooly heads would spin

Wooly head, wooly head, wooly head

Oh, wait a minute, even better

What if the Kurds got in the way?

Hey, Kurds and way, curds and whey

Sometimes the people

Is greater than their leader

Germany, Kentucky, and France

Sometimes a leader

Towers over his country

One shot at glory

They don't get a second chance

Drag these peasants

Kicking and screaming

Into the 21st century

I thought we'd make it

Must've been dreaming

These chicken farmers and file clerks

Gonna be the death of me

I can't do it

Sure, you can

I can't do it

Yeah, you can

What makes you say that, girls?

Tell you why, 'cause you're the Putin man

Who whipped Napoleon?

We did

Who won World War II?

The Americans

That's a good one, ladies

It's our turn to sit in the comfy chair

And you're the man gonna get us there

I don't know, Lenin couldn't do it

I don't know, Stalin couldn't do it

Now, they couldn't do it, why you think I can?

You're gonna lead our people to the promised land

You're right, 'cause goddamn, I'm the Putin man