Tankee M – Najpopularniejsze utwory
Kredyty
COMPOSITION & LYRICS
Tankee M
Songwriter
Tekst Utworu
It's late, 10 pm
I'm headed to a party
I took the car from mommy, I can't afford mine
I got a shoulder to crime on
I'm wearing my shoulder holster, my gun sleeps there
I'm driving, I check the glass, but I keep staring at who I am
I tear the realview mirror off and I throw it on the tarmac
I'm nervous, I sip to look sober, it calms me
My armpit is literally fire
Full of drops, no one brought water
I smell gunpowder, I'm sweating bullets
I'm at the crossroad and each clock tick sounds louder
I check the magazines, too much liquids
I stopped to take a leak then I restarted the engine
Wheels start to spin, I get phone called
"Sorry, two minutes, I got stucked"
Traffic lies, but the red is in my pupil
I turn it off, I don't want to be annoyed
Lots of smoke around me, the pipe exhausts during all the trip
I'm shaking, maybe for the cold, maybe I got tension
My fame is about to blow in this nation
I arrive at the place, my hands feel the warmth
I park next to the exit door
I fix my tie, the jacket, I drink once more
I breath the pipe, I hide the magazines and my phone
Get in the place, shake some hands, kiss someone, but I can't dance
I met my friends, I can't wait to see 'em dead
How long will it take, I don't know
The show starts as soon as the chorus takes stage
When I'm at the disco I never whisper my discord (I free it)
Nod to the notes but soon you'll all intone the same tone
When I'm at the disco I never whisper my discord (I free it)
Nod to the notes but soon you'll all intone the same tone
I show you a secret, just don't call your man, you laying our plan
I get my hands red but you lend me the bullets
I show you a secret, just don't call your man, you laying our plan
I get my hands red but you lend me the bullets
Moon is up, my mood is fucked
Where's my fucking phone, I gotta see the time
Maybe I overslept, there's blood flowing 'till my chest
Ok let's start again
It's very late, 9 pm
The party was yesterday, I woke up in my car, but I'm at my lair
But I drank too much, I still feel lairy
I'll tell you my intentions 'cause my interactions are burnt in flames
The lure of fate is you can't create, you don't have to explain
All happens 'cause so it was made
Yesterday I felt like a gunmage, die was cast
Tux, aftershave, I bought a gun to put crosses and share some faith
I drove to the place
I drank, the clock, I pissed, someone called, "I'm stucked"
I turned off, the disco, last look, I went in
I hate to do the maths, where you just need a line to become negative
Maybe I got beat to death, somehow I beat death
It was my performance, those bummies
This was my best hat trick from my top asset
Dad left, my mom and I rot in our place
I took the gun, I hid the magazines but the gun was empty
I just wanted to act bossy
"Pal I'm gonna pin your head like a post it"
I kept drinkin', there was a girl, I told her to give me some booze
I don't even like discos, all my life has been blues
I drank drank, 'till everything blurred
I need informations, I found my phone
I turn it on, I got twelve lost calls
My mom she called me she told me "Honey, come back home" (I free it)
I lied about the traffic
Reality was I was just about to start the matinee
Guilt hits, I found the hidden magazines
It's time to do the right thing
Close your eyes, and breath
Wait didn't mom noticed I'm parked here?
Wind blows, it's cold, I phoned home but seems like no one's around
I load the gun, I hid it, I clean my nose with my sleeve then I stand
I'm walking
I can see the window open, mom's there, maybe she fell asleep
No one's around: it's late and tomorrow is monday
I rang the neighbour, I don't have my keys
Wait, someone might've broken in, I run
The guy sees me and says my boyfriend beat me up
I tell him to get lost quick, I lay a barrier between us
I can't wait for the elevator, I rush the stairs
These steps are hard, I'm panting
I find the door, I knock, no one comes
I go to the owner I say I lost my keys, he's scared
He says I need a doctor, he's an ass and I can't show the gun
Window opened with such a wind
I'm paranoid and my nose bleeds I'm about to free
We get to my place, he opens the door, I ask him to leave
I call for my mom, I go to her room
There she's haning from the lamp I click the pistol and
Shit I forgot a detail
I got the gun, but I was afraid
I bought blank bullets just to intimidate
My nose bleeds, the window is there
The widow is hanged, the son is on the edge
Wait, my mom, she left a text
"I called my son, he said he was stucked in the traffic
It's sad 'cause he got no driving license, I feel powerless
Cops can't find him, don't waste your time
I've been an awful mom, love to my son
We'll meet again with his dad
Send this to the prison where he's held"
All this time my ass was in the car
I'm driving crazy when the owner comes in
"You forgot the keys again and I think I heard shooting"
He sees us, he shits himself
The letter, he's talking, my father was caught
He shot a cashier 'cause mommy had no money for medical visits
They wanted me to live, I aim at him, I laugh
He's crying goddamm, he's saying he helped us
We never paid rent, he gifted us some comfort
He never wanted anything back
One thing I gotta admit, then nothing more
His story might be less embarassing than
The reason my mom can't touch the floor
It was all in my head
The shootings, the body thumps
The shells, nothing was real but the booze
Third week, it's 3 am
We told the police mom hanged herself
That night I was beaten to death they took my phone and my pocket
And I'm sorry but every night I'm drank
This shit got bubbles, soon they'll blow up to my face
Those shots hit hard, I still feel soured
I don't cut myself no more so it flows for more hours
This therapy is like paying rides not to spoil your new car
And the carsick is a cursin
Everytime I puke my soul looks dirty
You can't cheer with something you call booze
These bottles serve me, but they give the orders
Liquor is hard to hold, I'm stucked in a labyrinth
Maybe we're too weak?
I'm bendt by these blendings, I can't stick to the recipe
I bawled my pain, I striked down ten bottles like they were pins
I suffer, these alcohols fill my ache holes, but my livin' is sliced
I wonder who sips more, this hunch or I?
It's a puddle of power where we drown till we stop
We fix the deed, and it becomes a puddle of powder where we round
This loop can't stop, I'm a mill for my melancholy
I dont want your attentions anymore
This war trend became a worn defect, not a warm defense
Fighting an addiction is like walking barefoot
You feel cold at every step you take
Nothing that's left, I paid to bang
I didn't know the price would be my mom hanged
But the problem is not who I became
The problem is going back to whoever I was before that place
I still feel out the rythm and despite tempo goes on
I just follow the tenth pot, that's what I crave
The best part of being sober is that you can lie
One drops two drops, it's an alignement
I don't know why but I still hide those blank bullets
Even if I damped the gun in a camp
I'd love to go to my dad, but if I told him the truth
I dont know how he could react and if I lied to him
How could I after all he did to give us a stable rent?
Hi, I'm detective Egnarts
And I've been working on your mother's suicide
I got your file here and we analyzed all the clues, the leads
And the version you told us matched with the witness, sir Yrot Seslaf
The asian man identified as the owner of your place
Now, before moving on I'd like you to answer a few last
Sir wait, please
What is it?
You feeling good, sir? Are you ok?
What do you mean?
Your voice sounds strange, are you ok, sir?
What's wrong with my voice sir
Wait, wait, don't say my name please, don't say my name
What's wrong with my voice?
Actually nothing, I'm just feelin nervous
It's a really, it's, it's a tough situation
Ok, well that's something I wanted to ask
'Cause we found this letter among the clues
And we noticed two little details
Details, it's said details sir
Details
It's not details
Details, that's what I said
Oh ok, sorry, sorry, sorry, it's just, sorry
I'm just overthinkin too much, sorry sorry
And we noticed two little details
First of all, it says "Love to my son" and the name part
Has been torn off, there's no name, was it you?
Yes, it was me but I can explain
Wait, wait, keep calm
There's another detail
Your mom said you took her car without any driving license
And then you turned off the phone because you were going somewhere
Now here's a picture of the car
Do you agree that this is your mom's car and
By consequence the car you personally drove
The night everything happened?
I do agree but please I can explain
Ok, go on, do you want a battle or war?
Excuse me?
Do you want a bottle of water?
Oh ok, sorry sorry sorry, I'm fine thanks
So, uhm, I went to a party, some of my friends saw me
And I'm sure they can witness
At a certain point I was going back to my car and I got beat
There were like three or four people but I didn't see them
I didn't see them, I swear
You are not a kid anymore sir, why didn't you tell your mom?
I mean, how do I tell mom
"Hey I'm taking your car without any license
'Cause I gotta go to a party at 10 pm?"
Well then you and your mom weren't that comfortable together
Who tells me that it wasn't you
That you just killed her and then made up a suicide scene?
I mean, I mean are you serious?
It's my mom, it's my mom, she's my blood, I'm his blood
Her blood
Anyway, I'm her blood
Well we found blood in the car you drove as well
Please, you gotta believe me
Look sir, there's something I'm not getting
Because you get beat to death
And they just get your pocket and your phone
But they don't get your car
It sounds a little bit awkward to me and to us
I swear, I don't know why, you gotta believe me
Ok, let's say I believe you, why was this so important for you?
I just wanted to be my friends
This time I didn't get what you said
To be with my friends, sorry I got confused
You know, I work for a misery during the whole day
And I can't afford a license or a car and I wanted to have a good time
Well, it wasn't that good, was it?
Are you rubbing it in?
You feeling good sir? I said nothing
You said "it wasn't that good, was it?" I swear I heard that
Look sir, PTSD is something completely normal after such experience
It can happen that you hear or see something that's not real
Besides other things
Some psychologists analyzed the name part of the letter
As a symbol of self hate due to what happened
I just wanna tell you that we all make mistakes
Now, I wanna help you. You got two choices
Go to a court for tefth and unlicensed driving
And other stuff that we could get to
But that would also mean paying an attorney
And other stuff I wouldn't suggest
Or you can book for a psychology course
That the precinct will tell you about
It's your choice, sir
Can I have some time alone please?
Sure, just one last thing
We found some blank bullets in your place. Got something to say?
My dad would use those to rob and get us some money to survive
When he got caught
That was the only thing left to remind me what he did for me
The only thing that I stare to think about the right thing to do
To say
Because there's a man in this world that gave his life
To assure mine and my mom's
And one's already gone, so now it's just me
Well I agree with that
Actually there is a cashier that gave his life
So that three other people could live, ye, I agree
What?
I said nothing sir
Anyway, you know, that's what I thought when I read your file
But then I thought
Why would life give that man a real bullet
When he was face to face with that cashier?
I don't know
My mother was pregnant, he knew that money wouldn't be enough
So he might have lost control for a moment
And he did what he didn't have to
And you know what?
I'm sure this is the real reason
Because my dad was not a monster
He was my dad, I carry no shame for what he did
I carry it for what I did
And those blank bullets are all that's left now
Mind your tones, kid
It was just a ordinary question, sir
So, feel free to take your time, we'll be outside
Something new, Detective? Do you want a coffee?
Everything seemed ok, Yrev, his life is a trouble
He resembles someone
Is he the guy whose father killed the cashier?
I'm not good at remembering faces
Yes it's him
Oh, I read the folder
His father loved blues music but he faced many problems
May I say we should keep an eye on his son, Detective?
No that's exaggerating
He's a good boy
I honestly feel like I should go talking to his dad about this
He's too weak to do it
I should do something to help him
Instead of making theories about his mental health
The psychology course will take care of that, I'm sure
Detective, I don't want to set up a debate, but that's against the law
I'll explain myself better
Maybe he didn't tell his father for a purpose
Or 'cause he doesn't want to
You should have his permission before moving on, Detective
I mean, nothing against your autorithy, but
Yrev, I'm a dad too
I know what he's feeling now
He loves his dad, he carries shame for what he did
He's hiding, that's his purpose
But it's his dad
He'd love him even if he had made the craziest thing known to mankind
He just doesnt realize it
'Cause he hasn't had his dad near since he was born
It's been about twenty three years pal
Exactly Detective, you're right, he's twenty three
I dont' want to question your expertise
But he's old enough to think with his head
He tried once and his mom committed suicide
Well, Detective, you're right
I apologize
Look, I want to help him, he's a good man
You're still young
You'll learn that there are human beings before rules
Before a death sentence, before a court
I gotta make the difference to show the value of justice
Honestly I don't know what else to expect from this world, Detective
I mean I could sound rude and I truly apologize for this
But I wouldn't be surprised if tomorrow he ran crazy
And went to the nearest place shooting to someone
Like his dad did
You can't predict life
Also, I think we should look for a witness in his place
It looks strange that only these two people were up that night
Someone might be hiding, they might have seen something
You're so paranoid
Maybe you should book for the course as well
I guess you can't predict future
But as man of justice, I gotta do my best to keep that chance away
So I'll do what's better
I'm sure you will, Detective, as usual
Hey, tell me something
Sure Detective, anything
How does my voice sound?
Ehm... As usual I'd say. Nothing strange. It's completely normal. Why?
Doesn't matter, I just think sometimes I should quit smoking
Well that's a choice of yours Detective
I'm no one to define what's good or not for your health
See you, Yrev
May I ask for a favor as well, Detective?
Sure
Could you turn off the air conditioner, please?
It's really noisy and it's getting a little bit too cold in here
I can't focus and I want to flash the world with my whole abilities
As you want
Thanks, Detective
Sorry for bothering
Very kind of you
See you
Look at you, sitting there with your shaky voice
Your paints, you're an anwful actor
You feel smart, but as everyone like you
You walked on the smallest hole that will crack your ice
'Cause if you want someone to really believe you
You don't gotta force what you want him to believe
You gotta mask it
If I gifted you a car with a scratch on the steering wheel
You would hug me but you'll keep in mind that detail
If I gifted you a car with no steering wheel, but covered
You'll have to wait for the moment
You'll take the blanket off to notice it
And by that moment I'll be away
Probably alone because I treat everyone the same way
Recalling that little fragment of time
Where you hugged me thinking
That I made you an extremly valuable gift
You would never expect that it was probably false
And had no steering wheel, 'cause it was covered
And so I could feel your real affection
Doesn't matter if you hate me or not in general
In that moment you'll be surprised by my gift
And even for a second, your hug would hold some feeling in it
I'm smarter than you, I'm smarter than your dear Detective
But no one sees it and that's my strength point
And before saying that I'm a bad person
That I'm awful, that I play people
Think why I had to cover my imperfections
Rather than showing the flaws
Would you make it till here if it was all natural?
I mean, actually this is natural
So? Yes? Sure
That's what everyone says
That's what everyone stands for
'Till they don't find someone they love away from them
And they realize they'll have to stick to people like me
Or that everything they stood for was useless
Since it has been a false opinion since the start
And so you'll end up agreeing with my words
Or in a worse case, or best, it's your choice
You'll load your gun and I can guess where you'd be headed to
You know, most people don't even want to hurt anyone
They're just looking for a feeling, for that adrenaline
That gun of theirs might be loaded with blank bullets
Because when a problem is personal
You gotta blow the explosive inside
But you don't need the bullet to come outside
It has to hit you in your inner part
And what's better than blank bullets for that?
You'll feel awful, and in that moment you'll be asking for help
Before relying on the technique I just told you about
And amongst all the people you'll run to, there will be so many
"There are two kinds of people"
"There are three kinds of people in this world"-lifewrecked experts
They just stare the world "analyzin'"
So big of a word for what they really do, their own reality
Since they live in a world where they are a god moving the puppets
Basing their knowledge
Another big word for someone like that, on simple things
It's not even enough to call them ideas
"Everyone using social medias
Is sticking to a trend and needs attentions"
"If you help someone and then that person disappoints you
You should've expected that"
"You can do whatever you want
I'm no one to define what's good or not for your health"
This is one of my favorites
And last but not least
"I don't expect anything from people, they are all the same
I'm good alone, everyone is false"
They might also take the blame for something
'Cause they want to look responsible
They just need attentions
They are lonelier than you and I will ever be
My dear painty kid sitting in that room
The best part is seeing them arguing
It's a fight to who looks
Because they are not feeling like that, more bored, lackadaisical
Talking as if they already knew all the words that are being spoken
Well, actually that might be real since they all say the same things
What a disappointement
I hope I don't cause something like that with my monologues
I would blame it on me honestly, ye
But I know it will happen
Reality is that it doesn't matter how much you stick to people
You can't learn their real emotions
You'll find yourself in a paradox
Depending on how long your walk will last
When it gets to me
My path has been long enough to say that
There are three kinds of people in your world
The ones watchin' through a mirror
In my case it's a one way's and I'm observing human failure
Actually, wow
I wonder which model is yours and who or what you stare at
The ones who are still wondering how I scratched a steering wheel
And the ones that didn't make it 'till here
'Cause they left for the nearest gun shop
Writer(s): Tankee M
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