Better Off Without a Wife

So this is kind of a little anthem here... All my friends are married Every Tom and Dick and Harry You must be strong If you to go it alone Here's to the bachelors And the bowery bums And those who feel that they're the ones That are better off without a wife I like to sleep until the crack of noon Midnight howlin' at the moon Goin' out when I wanto And I'm comin' home when I please I don't have to ask permission If I wanna go out fishin' Never have to ask for the keys I never been no Valentino But I had a girl who lived in Reno She left me for a trumpet player But it did'nt get me down He was wanted for assault Though he said it weren't his fault You know the coppers rode him right out of town They say I'm kinda selfish about my privacy Now as long as I can be with me We get along so well I can't even believe it I love to chew the fat with folks I've been listening to all your dirty jokes I'm so thankful for these friends I do rarely see Hey I've got this girl I know, man She's been married several times And I don't wanna end up like her I mean, she's been married so many times She's got ricemarks all over her face Yeah, you know the kind...