Cynical Christmas

Dear old Father Christmas, he don't come around no more He don't know your name, he don't speak your language I guess you'll have to buy your Christmas at the store Jesus Christ don't come around no more Jesus Christ don't come around no more The reason for the season is commerce, you see So I'm sorry, but you'll have to take a back seat, J.C. Jesus Christ don't come around no more I don't put up no Christmas tree, I don't waste my time I don't go out caroling, it's too cold outside 'Cause there ain't nothing sacred, ain't nothing like old times Just a Cynical Christmas, another year gone by Santa Claus don't come around no more Santa Claus don't come around no more The corporations are gonna do it their way, Who needs that big ol' fat ol' man anyway Santa Claus don't come around no more Well, I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus I told my dad and what a stink it was He punched Santa in the face and gave Mom what for Well Santa Claus don't come around here no more I don't put up no Christmas tree, I don't waste my time I don't go out caroling, it's too cold outside 'Cause there ain't nothing sacred, ain't nothing like old times Just a Cynical Christmas, another year gone by See, Father Christmas, he don't come around no more Father Christmas, he don't come around no more He's got two kids in Nashville, he's got one in Singapore And he don't pay no alimony and he don't pay no child support I don't put up no Christmas tree, I don't waste my time I don't go out caroling, it's too cold outside 'Cause there ain't nothing sacred, ain't nothing like old times Just a Cynical Christmas, another year gone by