A Barn Conversion

T'was not a handy man, though he inherited land

With a dilapidated old structure

Now don't you be casting aspersions

Just 'cause he's dreaming of a barn conversion

All the manly farmers they be shaking their heads

Who by their looks were fixing to puncture

The balloon of his idyllic version

He was envisioning a barn conversion

Ooh, well

In his mind he could see it so clearly

A place where his friends and his family could go

But as he fell from ladders

Through windows cheerfully

The local yokels got a first class slapstick comedy show

He was the talk of the town for every town around

They would laugh till their bellies ruptured

But they never did cause him diversion

And now he's living in his barn conversion

All the old ladies with their yarn perversions

They are so jealous of his barn conversion

Ooh

Well