Hard To Live

Its hard to live a life when you can to fail to fight

Its hard to live with trauma your early life

I just wanna see the light

See the reason why

Why I gotta fight over flight

Why can't I just see the light

See the good things that happened in my life

Just wanna be held on tight

Help forget about the negative sights

Despite going through adoption

Trauma takes away my oxygen

Hate relationships that end toxic

Thats why I became an alcoholic

Doctor gives a diagnostic

Tells me how to take out the negative toxins

Tells me learn to be become logic

Even tho my life was catastrophic

Trauma came periodic

Learned that therapy n sobriety

Blocks it

Its hard to live a life when you just wanna fly

Its hard to live with the devil messing with your life

At times I just wanna fly

Been through the times I wanted to die

My kids is what keeps me arrised

Being beaten throws me in a panic

Tired of feeling n being abandoned

Im not being dramatic

This is my life in panoramic

Its hard to live a life when your not even happy

Its hard to live with a life full of agony

Why do I wake feeling crappy

Scared of going through the beatings

 Like you wonder why I have a hard time sleeping

Childhood trauma seems to defeat me

I try to let the past go

But 24 years of feeling low

Is hard to let happiness grow

Yea I try to take it slow

But repetitive friends n family become a foe

Hard to let it go

Even though it started 23 years ago

I think its time I let it be known

It's hard to live a life when you fail to fight

Just wanna be able to fly