Living In Vain

I push and push and push everyone away Isolate myself, it's just easier that way Seeking revenge on society and revenge on myself Both have let me down more times than I can count Dying to live, afraid to die Dying to live, afraid to die With thoughts of mortality I close my eyes Searching for answers, living in vain Life is torture and love is pain Violence, vices, repeat the cycle The things I use to feel okay for a while Violence, vices, repeat the cycle I just want to feel okay for a while I'm a loner but I hate to be lonely Pain inside my heart, but I can't let it control me Feels like I'm stuck in reverse Before every step forward I take 3 back first Chip on my shoulder next to the weight of the world