Evile

What do I do

When I feel all is lost

And I shudder

As a vile ignorance

Blissfully overtakes this land

Floating in the ether

I wonder

Where I am

Where we're going

A pit of stenching bottles

Of unopened pill capsules

Locked in brutal anguish

Camps in the night

They've taken us

Watching cops win for fun

In chilling amusement

Desensitized and motionless

Living in a bubble

No affect

Only inside the bubble

It's the surface cracks

Not even glass

An ornate chandelier shatters

Into a million shards of denial

I question my will to stay and watch it unfold

Am I a coward?

Is my spirit getting old?

Using spirits and smoke to cope

My coughing cat in denial

My virtual video game style

Meaningless

Breathe in the languid air

And try to stay awake

Losing sleep alone tonight

I wish it wasn't so

I can't take this anymore

I imbibe another slurried season

I cannot feel my legs

Clowns at the top of their cruel game

Bark newly outrageous orders

As I consume arthouse tv

An ironic sense of nothing

I am alone

My shapeshifting

Has left me barren

And tried

Push and pull

Til neither party

Has energy

There is no reaction, truly

When drenched in apathy

A simple idea

A simple reaction

A complex contraption

Can never be overturned

Irony and dissonance

Distanced defense

Letting it slide

To intellectualize

And cry later

Why are my heroes phonies?

And who am I?

Death to false idols

The self and the unity matters.