Fifteen

I was fourteen you were fifteen by just a few months you'd remind me I still think of you the same I did that day When I was eighteen you were nineteen yeah I was leaving you wouldn't find me I couldn't feel good alone unless I knew that you would stay You grew your hair out just to spite me; I was a nuanced sort of frightening Kept thinking that everything you did came back to me Do you wish I had stayed Or gone away Wait and you will find me, I barely even paused it felt so frightening I barely even thought it out, pretending I see things clearly But now we'll wait, move on, get on, get over I couldn't stay awake, you couldn't stay here sober I watched you move along, you watched yourself float right through me But now it's all coming back to me The way you want I just couldn't need The way you left I would never leave You asked me please Did I forget about those two straight years you spent with me In the electric fields between our parent's streets maybe That's when I knew you'd go to war for me When I found you there were scars where sunspots used to be But I had licked myself a spotless clean I think I tried to hide but you'd seen There was no fight there in me