Thick Thighs

I've heard

I've been hearing about dad bods a little too long

So what about my muffin top is wrong?

Sucking in really sucks, even if I had a million bucks

I'd hire Jillian Michaels and I'd probably still give up

I can't be the only one who likes extra fries over exercise

I never eat the produce that I buy, so why even try?

You can't spell diet without die

I've been eating carbs since '95

And I've heard thick thighs save lives

God bless the Kardashians for bringing curves back

And all the sexy one-pieces hanging on the racks

If you can't handle these love handles

You can find me at McDonald's and trust me, they'll be lovin' it

I can't be the only one who likes extra fries over exercise

I never eat the produce that I buy, so why even try?

You can't spell diet without die

I've been eating carbs since '95

And I've heard thick thighs save lives

Now I can't tell you what is gluten-free

But I can tell you, you won't catch me counting calories

Or macros, or net carbs, or hell, MSG

I can't be the only one who likes extra fries over exercise

I never eat the produce that I buy, so why even try?

You can't spell diet without die

I've been eating carbs since '95

And I've heard thick thighs save lives

And I've heard thick thighs save lives

So love thigh-self