Addiction

And I don't even know how I got this far Don't even bother tryna save me I don't like the drugs, but the drugs like me Everything I want, but I'm still dying Even when I'm down, know I'm still trying I'm not really living, I'm just surviving I've been lookin' for my purpose again And I'm barely hangin' on by a thread It's been gettin' too hard to pretend I just wanna let go of my sins Callin' out for help, but I don't got no one to talk to Try to be a better man, but it always falls through I'm feelin' like a disappointment, I'm hearin' voices I've been on the edge again And you know it's hard to be myself sometimes When I only want what's worse for me And I hate what I became, now I'm so stressed out Tried to medicate to push these thoughts out All alone, I don't wanna need these pills to function I supply my own destruction I wish life came with instructions Maybe then I'd finally change I don't like the drugs, but the drugs like me Everything I want, but I'm still dying Even when I'm down, know I'm still trying I'm not really living, I'm just surviving I've been lookin' for my purpose again And I'm barely hangin' on by a thread It's been gettin' too hard to pretend I just wanna let go of my sins Withdrawals, they go on and on It's been so long, but I'm hangin' on And I've been lettin' the ones down that love me I just push 'em away 'Cause I don't even know myself or who I am These days embrace pain to try and feel something And I don't even know how I got this far Don't even bother tryna save me All alone, I don't wanna need these pills to function I supply my own destruction I wish life came with instructions Maybe then I'd finally change I don't like the drugs, but the drugs like me Everything I want, but I'm still dying Even when I'm down, know I'm still trying I'm not really living, I'm just surviving I've been lookin' for my purpose again And I'm barely hangin' on by a thread It's been gettin' too hard to pretend I just wanna let go of my sins