Daytime TV

When I was a kid I used to fake sick Luckily my mom and dad were Pretty easy to trick I was biding my time Until the house was all mine To do the one thing I really wanted to do Which was watching daytime TV While there's no one home to watch me I'm hangin' out with Maury's Doing a paternity test Are you the father, well it's anybody's guess And give me Jerry Springer Judge Joe Brown, Judge Judy, and a TV dinner I guess the best things in life come free Like watching daytime TV When I was a kid The world was a mystery There were so many things that Just didn't make sense to me And the way to find out What all the fuss was about And to satisfy my healthy curiosity Was by watching daytime TV While there's no one home to watch me I'm hangin' out with Maury's Doing a paternity test Are you the father, well it's anybody's guess And give me Jerry Springer Judge Joe Brown, Judge Judy, and a TV dinner I guess the best things in life come free Like watching daytime TV There's no one home to watch me There's no one home to stop me From hangin' out with Maury I'm hangin' out with Genevieve There's no one home to watch me There's no one home to stop me From hangin' out with Maury I'm hangin' out