Natalie's Rap (feat. Natalie Portman & Chris Parnell)

And in 3, 2, 1

We're sitting here today with films star Natalie Portman

Hello

So, Natalie, What's the day in the life of Natalie Portman like?

Do you really wanna know?

Please, tell us

I don't sleep motherfucker off that Yak and Durban

Doing 120 getting head while I'm swervin'

(Damn Natalie you a crazy chick)

Yo, shut the fuck up and suck my dick

I bust in dudes mouths like gushers motherfucker

Roll up on on NBC and smack the shit outta Jeff Zucker

(What you want Natalie?)

To drink and fight

(What you need Natalie?)

To fuck all night

Don't test me when I'm crazy on that airplane glue

Put my foot down your throat till your shits in my shoe

Leave you screaming, pay for my dry cleanin'

Fuck your man, it's my name that he's screamin'

I'm sorry Natalie, are we to believe

You condone driving while intoxicated?

I never said I was a role model

But what about the kids that look up to you?

Do you have a message for them?

All the kids looking to to me can suck my dick

It's Portman motherfucker, drink till I'm sick

Slit your throat, and pour nitrous down the hole

Watch you laugh and cry, while I laugh, you die

And all the dudes, you know I'm talking to you

(We love you Natalie)

I wanna fuck you too

(P) Is for Portman

(P) Is for pussy

I'll kill your fucking dog for fun, so don't push me

Wow, Natalie, I'm surprised

All this from a Harvard graduate

Well there's a lot you may not know about me

Really, such as?

When I was in Harvard, I smoke weed every day

I cheated every test and snorted all the yay

I gotta a def posse, you gotta bunch of dudes

I sit right down on your face and take shit

Natalie you are bad ass bitch

(Hell yeah)

And I always pay for your dry cleaning

What my shit gets in your shoe

(What?)

And as for the drug use

Well I can vouch for that

My dick is scared of you, oh

Okie doke, Natalie, one final question

If you could steal a smooch from an guy in Hollywood

Who would it

No more questions

What?