4% Pantomime

The management said they were sorry

For the inconvenience you are suffering

And Mr. Booking Agent, please have mercy

Don't book the jobs so far apart

We went up to Griffith Park

With a fifth of Johnnie Walker Red

And smashed it on a rock, and wept

While the old couple looked on into the dark

Oh, Richard, tell me if it's poker

Oh, Richard, tell me, who has got the joker? Is it poker?

Deuces wild, like an only child

I'll see what you got, how much is in the pot?

You pay the tips, I'll collect the chips

It's a full house tonight, everybody in town is a loser

Yeah, you bet

Dealer's been dealing me bad hands

From the bottom of the deck, without the slightest blush

And I don't know whether to call or check

But right now I feel like I got a royal flush

And my lady didn't show from 'Frisco

But we had to go on with the show

Everybody got stoned, it was a gas, it was a smash

Everybody got wrecked, checked, oh-oh, oh-oh

Oh, Belfast cowboy, lay your cards on the grade

Oh, Belfast cowboy, can you call a spade a spade?

Oh, Richard, tell me, tell me, tell me is this game a-poker?

I can't understand who the fool is that holds this joker

Is it poker?

Oh, Belfast cowboy, lay your cards down on the table

Oh, Belfast cowboy, do you think you're able?