Paying for It

I was just a little kid There was a hornet's nest in my fridge The man would come home: One hornet, two hornets, blacked out The man was gone But I know when he was just a boy, Every good road was destroyed Empty-table Thanksgiving Dad gone, mom gone, no heroes City-jungle living It didn't matter what I did An engineer can always build a bridge But the man was drowning Bottle bottle, can can, A bottle can make him disappear while he thinks he's home Now I'm paying for it But I'm so thankful for it All I ever wanted to be was grateful, strong, and perfect All I ever wanted for was no one to have to worry about me Now I'm paying for it But I'm so thankful for it Oh, I'm so grateful now to never have to be perfect In the dandelion in front of me, Awaiting is serenity I learned a hell of a lot from my dad: Make a fist, spit some lies, squeeze your cash Now I've been sitting in the mud Cracked temple, crumbled down, Somehow I gotta learn how to love Ma', you taught me a hell of a lot too I would have never sang if it wasn't for you I guess in the end it was all worth it Understanding Mom and Dad are my angels and they did they best they could Now I'm paying for it But I'm so thankful for it All I ever wanted to be was grateful, strong, and perfect All I ever wanted for was no one to have to worry about me Now I'm paying for it But I'm so thankful for it Oh, I'm so grateful now to never have to be perfect In the dandelion in front of me, Awaiting is serenity Now, all around me is a whole other scene, The subtleties of the sun and the breeze I gotta get the hell out the way and surrender to joy, Surrender to peace It's already here Let it do its thing Surrender to joy Surrender to peace It's already here Let it do its thing I've got a pond in my soul, And it wants to reflect the moon's glow If I can let it shine, if I can quit making waves, Let her sing her song Sing her song I've got a pond in my soul, And it wants to reflect the moon's glow If I can let it shine, if I can quit making waves, Let her sing her song Sing her song I've got a pond in my soul, And it wants to reflect the moon's glow If I can let it shine, if I can quit making waves, Let her sing her song Sing her song