DEARLY DEPARTED

I pray I find you at the bottom of the hill I pray I make it outta Texas I pray my AC come back on My momma stuck outside her job My sister just asked for a Lexus Can Jesus send me a message? What's the point of havin' a best friend if you end up losin' him? Woah, don't view my text messages Woah, don't view my text messages Don't view my bad side Only go on the 'Gram to show you motherfuckers the best side Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Why I hide? Huh For the great Mary J. Blige All alike, I made a mill' off a lie And I lie so I write another lie RCA don't know, it wasn't 'bout y'all No lies, 'bout how me and my brothers been traumatized And I must keep creatin' truths and hooks to get up outta this hell for myself Seashells Dearly departed Look what you've started I've been so heartless I try, I try, I try Why? Why? Why? Try Big dog, I feel like I don't got anybody on my side no more High is the low, truth be told It's hard to ignore, hard to endure Where's my stamina in this life? Make sure my family tight More rubies on my neck, and to catch me at night Lookin' immaculate, no one in sight Standards are high, expectation is low Wake up sweatin' at night, mind in a flight I don't get scared no more when I'm standin' on the mountaintop I'm afraid of people dyin' Rest in peace Wako, Ray, Rita Wish you could've took me to Japan Back ten years, holdin' my hand, felt like a hundred grand Wish some letters didn't fade, love will never do the same Out the window screamin' your name, blessings Mama on track, my dad got my back My sister graduated, now she racin' Love her through the days and whiskey in my hand Bloody colored triggers wrapped around my wrist Lookin' magnificent, man No stoppin' me, no boggin' me down I know myself, me and the obstacles now I done shit on myself too much to not know how to move properly now On the property now, money gets foul Keep your wits about you They stretch the truth longer than the Nile Eyes full of evil, mouth full of vile They tracin' your smile Stay alert, big dog Only one life is offered to you (Only one life is offered to you) How many sides to a story can there be when you saw it with your own eyes? I got all my thoughts out on records y'all won't ever hear Try to give it time Find that truth trickles down, hits the fear And freezes over like a dagger to the spine When somebody that you know throws you in the fire How do you survive? I kicked down the door inside a home I did it all just to save a friend's life Little did I know, the one who pulled the strings was once on my side I had just moved to Texas, tried to make it right I do not feel obliged to dismiss the truth because of how I feel about our time If I knew what you would do to someone you owe money to, you wouldn't get a dime Watchful when you win, sorry 'bout your plans That was all a scam, you won't understand Pass the weight off to your friends and never face the truth Because you never learned how to be a man And it's not my fault, and it's not my problem anymore That's just where you stand That's just who you are That's your cross to bear You could talk to God I don't wanna hear, motherfucker!