A Thing You Call Joy

Grip the water flowing and it falls Faster from the palms You told me so calm and knowing To watch its working flow And not to grip the hold of something So stoic it can't be stolen It's the flow of your water motion Not the measure of your pressure Grip the water flowing and it falls Faster from the palms Always a fall feeling after a calling There is always a fall I feel coming Grip the water flowing and it falls Faster from the palms Into the cave I keep going I go knowing Into the core of my condition Between the hours of rest and play I awake knowing Dancing to unknown music Of foreign origin Why am I forever in recovery from a thing you call joy And why am I so goddam blessed On earth Why am I There's the living me and the four of you All of my phantoms chanting Maybe I'm too sensitive Feeling everything I'm told tenfold I have awoken Before I have spoken I have awoken I feel like the daytime chasing the night Thrown to the dawn Thrown two ways at twilight Darker! brighter! Any way but this When I am thrown to the night In the hallways of the mind In the corridors of midnight I am reborn Every waking morning Without warning I feel like the daytime chasing the night I have awoken Before I have spoken I have awoken I'm grateful to watch you moving by I'm grateful for the waves The solid rocks are dry For me Why am I forever in recovery from a thing you call joy Forever refilling And why am I So goddamn blessed On earth why am I Closer I feel to truth Closer comes the falling There's a stale mate stalling Always a fall feeling after a calling There is always a fall I feel coming There's a stale mate stalling my calls There's a stale mate stalling