Southside - Ken Garr: Song Lyrics, Music Videos & Concerts

Southside

Comedy

Southside was released on September 25, 2019 by Ken Garr as a part of the album So I'm Sittin' in Jail

Song Details

AlbumSo I'm Sittin' in Jail

Release DateSeptember 25, 2019

LabelKen Garr

LanguageEnglish

Melodicness

Acousticness

Valence

Danceability

Energy

OVERVIEW

LYRICS

Credits

PERFORMING ARTISTS

Kenneth Garr

Performer

COMPOSITION & LYRICS

Kenneth Garr

Songwriter

Lyrics

I come from a big family, I grew up on the South Side of Chicago

Here's the thing about growing up on the South Side, man, once you're

A South Sider, you're always a South Sider. You know what I'm saying?

And you can move away, you can move far away, you know, and you like

Try to keep that inner South Side in you, you know, try not to let

It out. But every once in a while, it comes out. I remember I was a

Salesman for a long time. I was on this sales call one time and this

Dude looks at me and goes, uh, "You know, with the prices you're

Giving me, I should take you outside and slap the shit out of you

That's when my South Side came out." And I started laughing, you

Know, not like a funny laugh, but a crazy "heh heh heh heh heh heh

Heh heh heh heh." He goes, "What's so funny, tough guy?" I said, "

I never told you, I'm from the South Side of Chicago." He's like, "

Yeah, what's that mean?" I said, "If you're gonna take me outside and

Slap the shit out of me, bring some fucking friends. I may not win

The fight, but it's gonna be a good one." But it's funny, I grew up

I got a huge family, man. I've got, uh, six nieces and two nephews

My oldest brother has got five daughters. God bless him. I'm like, "

Bro, how did you manage to have five girls?" He said, "My sperm is so

Powerful, blew the balls right off them, woo!" He's got a mullet

It's cute though, man. Like, I went over to my brother's the other

Day, and my youngest niece, she's about 18 months old, she starts

Staring at me like I owed her money, you know? So finally I'm like

"Bro, why is the baby staring at me like that?" He goes, "Oh, that's

Her shit face." I'm like, "What?" He's like, "Yeah, she's taking a

Shit right now." I'm like, "That is awesome! Why can't we do that?

" You know? "Hey, Ken, I need you to work overtime this week." "Ugh

" "Ken, you taking a shit right now?" "Yeah. It's the ten day

Challenge." I have a sister and uh, my sister's got two kids, and

She's a very liberal parent, you know? Uh, she watches Supernanny

Like every day. Doesn't believe in spanking, which is fine, you know

It's a choice that all parents have to make. If you want little

Assholes running around, whatever. But it's funny 'cause she'll ask

Me to babysit every once in a while and I don't know anything about

Kids, you know what I'm saying? So she'll leave all these

Instructions, and one of them said "Discipline". Said if Zachary's

Bad, he's my little five-year-old nephew, if he's bad, you put him

In time out. I'm like, "Time out? What is that?" So I call her up

I'm like, "What's time out?" She's like, "Well, if he's bad, you put

Him in the corner for like four or five minutes 'til he learns his

Lesson." Well, is a corner gonna teach him a lesson? It's like, you

And I have very different definitions of time out, 'cause when I was

Growing up, time out was more like, "Time out, Dad, I think you broke

My nose." "Oh, wow. Dude, when'd you get a right cross? Alright, two

More bites of broccoli, big guy, you got it." You shouldn't mess with

My parents growing up, they weren't your friends. I grew up in a

Prison. My mom was the warden, my dad the

Executioner. I got spanked maybe three times my

Whole life, but they were all memorable experiences

Written by: Kenneth Garr

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