The Self-Help Guru (Who Couldn't Help Himself)

Lost in these days where nobody know's there name Caught up in the haze of fame and fortune Well here there came a man to guide the way And like the rain his wisdom was a-pourin' His goal to make the children That he raised burn inside just like a flame a-torchin' He gets his praise, the people get their craze But see he's not so big and brave, he's short, man The man's alone with no place to call his home No, no, no His family's all dead and gone He can't make friends, sees life through just one lenses Too stubborn to ever be wrong Don't have no girl, all trapped up in his world Treats most women just like his pawns He's waste of skin, burdened with all his sin Living life as a big ol' con Well, well now The self-help guru who couldn't help himself A heretic preaching the gospel of wealth Tends to put his problems up on the shelf His clock done clicked at a half-past twelve Oh, no Well, now Collecting green from his following Just to pay for his extravagant needs Another man who's been written into the plan of that all American greed See, his disciples begin to get stifled as they realize that their teacher-man's a fraud They start to heckle and turn like doctor Jeckle Im the face of their make-shift God, oh Well, now A mob is born burdened with only scorn Form the teacher-man who robbed them blind It seems his pockets been lined with golden lockets from the flock That he now calls his kind They go to his home, where they know he's all alone Hiding behind a big red door Seems like the self-help guru can't really help No, no, no Himself, anymore The self-help guru who couldn't help himself A heretic preaching the gospel fo wealth Tends to put is problems up on the shelf And his clock done clicked at a half-past twelve Oh, no