Fading Away

I feel like I've been gone for a long time My body's present but I cannot find my mind I used to love feeling everything inside But I'm afraid the well's run dry Every time I get a second to myself I can't help but give it up to someone else My brain is like a cavernous, empty shell And I'm lost inside What is going on? Where has my heart gone? I miss the sun I paint a smile on my face I keep my hands busy I try to trick myself But I know I am not okay I'm breaking under the weight Of the guilt filling up my plate I feel myself fading away I just wanna be left all alone Don't wanna say yes, don't wanna say no Don't wanna hear a sound anywhere I go The pain is too much, just let me be alone It hurts me to stay, it kills me to go Letting you down hurts more than you know And I could never be all that you want And it's been tearing me apart What is going on? Why am I so numb? I miss the sun I paint a smile on my face I keep my hands busy I try to trick myself But I know I am not okay I'm breaking under the weight Of the guilt filling up my plate I feel myself fading away And I know I can't keep living this way All these sleepless nights and wasted days I know what's to come if I don't change I'll soon've faded away I think of everyone else, but no one's there for me I've got to love myself and tell them I am not okay I'm buried under the shame and there's nobody else to blame I feel myself fading away I won't let myself fade away