Capt's Log: The S.S. Manatee

Captain's Log, day

0900 hours, aquatic standard time

Fair seas as we left port today

And after a brief Delay

To repair the damage from the

400 bottles Of Ciroc

That I smashed over the bow

We were off

And to think, just a few months ago I was

Just having a regular day on my volcano

Vigorously copulating with an Italian sorbet heiress

I met by running down the beach

With a road flare held aloft

As I recall, it was sometime between our

11th and 12th consecutive bout of torrential lovemaking

That she whispered to me an old family legend

The tale of an ancient island city

Where the kush grew taller than the treetops

Where every whip was foreign

And every man, woman, and child had an iced-out Roley

But one day, their women became too thicc

And the island sank into the sea

But some say they still live down there

At the bottom

When I heard this, I helicoptered straight to Ferrari headquarters

And there we sketched out the blueprints

For what would become

The world's finest custom luxury submersible

While Camilla and I had our twelfth episode of great sex on the desk

And today, as I look upon this magnificent vessel

My heart isn't the only thing that swells with pride

This is Captain Scoochie Boochie of the S.S. Manatee

And I will find the lost city of Atlantits