Massage Parlor, Pt. 1

Massage Parlor Pt. 1

This is Lissette speaking, How can I help you?

Hello, this is Estella Lowenstein and I'm on with my sister Sandra.

We're calling about the massage.

OK, well, when you guys are looking for an appointment.

Yes.

OK, what were you guys looking to book?

How early can we arrive there? Because we usually go to sleep for the day around noon.

We're open from 10 to seven.

All right. So we can get around 10, can get nice and relaxed and go shluffy by noon.

Do you take precautions dear because I already have a lot of diseases that are competing with each other. I can't introduce a new chicken to this cockfight.

No. Yeah. So you guys are required to wear your mask throughout the whole session and the massage therapist and everybody working here also gets, also wears a mask throughout the whole shift. And we you guys would have to get your temperature taken when you get here.

How how do you take the temperature? Because I don't I don't like the one in the back side.

It's just the one that reads your forehead.

Oh, thank God. Did you hear that?

Do we have to take our underwear off you? Could you wear a nice house dress

You undress till you're comfortable, to where you're comfortable.

Everyone there has been tested for Covid 29 and they're tested negative. Right. Because I, I received that the nasal one where the very the one where they go very far and they, they pick your nose and it's aggressively and I was negative.

They assault your nose. They assault you.

It's true.

Yeah. So our next appointment that would be available for 10:00 in the morning would be on next Friday. The 21st.

I think that works if we're still alive. What do you think?

I think that would be marvelous. And, you know, I say we roll the dice. Can I ask you a question dear? You do offer the social distance massages, right?

What do you mean

Aren't we supposed to stay six feet apart?

Yeah, but the massage therapist, would be to touch you, to massage you .

Is there someone that works there with very long arms.

No.

You know, I've been so sore ever since we took that long walk to the community college for the chicken cacciatore casserole competition. And the strange thing is, my tit hurts, ever since that stroll its been burning, I didn't even use the tit to walk that night.

My tit has been killing me, too. And it's very interesting because I had a double mastectomy in 1984 and in 1987.

OK, So would you like to book the appointment.

Oh yes dear. But could I, could I ask if it's if it could be a virtual massage.

What do you mean a virtual massage?

Could you have someone there that will just say Press your arm here and then we press it.

You know, just to be on the safe side. I mean, these days, Geez, everything's being taken from us that we love.

No, they would be touching you during the massage.

But what if they coach us on how to rub ourselves?

Just in case any of us is gangrenous with the Covid 74 virus? I would I think it should be better to be on the safe side. Don't you do dear.

Hello Dear

I think she just put us on hold.

What a shame.

Does that mean we don't get a happy ending?

I haven't had a good handee since the premiere of Godfather, so it was Marty. I can't stay away from those eyebrows.