Fake Smiles

It's like, the more I try, the less I feel In desperate need of something real Why, lately I ain't been the same? And why I try so hard to hide this pain? I search, but I can never find Can't seem to leave my past behind 'Cause all the ones I hope would stay Are all the ones that fade away Truth is I think about you often I miss your voice, I miss your smile that I used to get lost in I know you know I had this thing for you, I never lost it I think I just lost myself, in the midst of the nonsense Nine times out of ten, I'd close my eyes and dream about you Don't know what it was, but you just had this thing about you Lately we've been distant, see, I just can't be without you And my soul got so attached to yours, I can't be me without you, but We hate ourselves, because we run from the people we love And we all hold on to the past, 'cause we miss what it was Don't wanna feel, so we try to numbin' the pain with these drugs Livin' in hell, 'cause we lost faith in the place up above, and My anxiety is breaking me, it kills me I'm livin' in a world so fake, I lost touch of the real me Had to take a look back, just to ask me if I'm still me And would I still stand for this if they wanted to kill me? I can't take it no more, I just can't take it no more I can't smile like I'm okay, I just can't fake it no more I can't act like I've been happy and complacent no more 'Cause every time I try to change it, it's the same as before My karma is coming, my karma is coming, it's weighing in I'm drinking 'til all my feelings just fade away again And mama, she always told me this ain't a way to live But when you feel what I'm feeling that's just the way it is I'm trying not to break down, but I just can't hide this pain Saw myself in the mirror and I'm just not the same But who's to blame? I guess we all change We hurt the ones we love, because of our pain (fuck) It's like, the more I try, the less I feel In desperate need of something real Why, lately I ain't been the same? And why I try so hard to hide this pain? I search, but I can never find Can't seem to leave my past behind 'Cause all the ones I hope would stay Are all the ones that fade away Are all the ones that fade away Are all the ones that fade away