how to live

My friends always ask me if I'd ever let go again I never respond 'cause I'm scared that I might sound insane Or maybe I'm just afraid of the answer (answer) 'Cause I don't wanna believe that I could ever (ever) Be in control enough so I don't lose it all I've gained way too much, man, I can't afford to fall As long as my past and I are still out at war I promised myself I wouldn't let down my guard I've been holdin' myself back Damn, I forgot how to live I've been tryin' to be perfect I didn't even question it I think I forgot How I'm supposed to live Yeah, I think I fucked up I just wanna live One, two, almost three years went by Without anything easing my mind I need some damn peace, oh my It's gettin' harder to get through the night So I roll it up for them And I watch them breathe it in I don't think they understand Just how bad I wish that I was them I've been holdin' myself back Damn, I forgot how to live I've been tryin' to be perfect I didn't even question it I think I forgot How I'm supposed to live Yeah, I think I fucked up I just wanna live Fucked up, fucked up, fucked up, fucked up I've been holdin' myself back Damn, I forgot how to live I've been tryin' to be perfect I didn't even question it I think I forgot How I'm supposed to live Yeah, I think I fucked up I just wanna live I've been holdin' myself back Damn, I forgot how to live I've been tryin' to be perfect I didn't even question it I think I forgot How I'm supposed to live Yeah, I think I fucked up I just wanna live I just wanna live