Tess of the Dormobiles

I'm gonna rewind to the time when I first see you Fast forward to the place where you say 'I do' Then I'll press pause 'Cos I'm no longer yours How we ever got together is anyone's guess I was Betamax You were VHS You were more than happy on your own I wasn't even on the phone But soon towards our fate We seemed to gravitate And before we knew it I was Angel to your Tess And your Dormobile was my new home address And just for a while I too was VHS Oh yes Nature came and duly took its course Your heroine upon a big white horse And I fully understood It's for the greater good And you asked for a divorce And I said yes And I went back to my old familiar mess Hello Betamax You know the rest Well now who'd have thought we'd both end up in here? So close yet so nowhere near Hayley Mills, Daniel Boone Me Tarzan, you June Even now as both our ends are nigh I'd surely kill to have a second try But I'm on the ground floor You're up on high And I'm Freeview Bet you're with Sky