Arthur Mcbride (New Recording)

Oh me and my cousin, one Arthur McBride As we went a walkin' down by the seaside Now mark what followed and what did betide It being on Christmas morning Out for recreation we went on a tramp And we met Sergeant Knacker and Corporal Cramp (or Vamp) And a little wee drummer intending to camp For the day being pleasant and charming Good morning, good morning the sergeant did cry And the same to you gentlemen, we did reply Intending no harm but meant to pass by For it being on Christmas morning But says he my fine fellows if you will enlist It's ten guineas in gold I will slip in your fist And a crown in the bargain for to kick up the dust And to drink the King's health in the morning For a soldier he leads a very fine life He always is blessed with a charming young wife And he pays all his debts without sorrow or strife And always lives happy and charming And a soldier he always is decent and clean In the finest of clothing he's constantly seen While other poor fellows go dirty and mean And sup on thin gruel in the morning Says Arthur, I wouldn't be proud of your clothes You've only the lend of them as I suppose And you dare not change them one night or you know If you do you'll be flogged in the morning And although we are single and free We take great delight in our own company And we have no desire strange places to see Although your offer is charming And we have no desire to take your advance All hazards and danger we barter on chance And you'd have no scruples to send us to France Where we would be shot without warning And now says the sergeant, I'll have no such chat And I neither will take it from spalpeen or brat For if you insult me with one other word I'll cut off your heads in the morning And then Arthur and I we soon drew our hods? And we scarce gave them time for to draw their own blades When a trusty shillelagh came over their heads And bade them take that as fair warning As for their old rusty rapiers that hung by their sides We flung it as far as we could in the tide To the Devil I pitch you, says Arthur McBride To temper your steel in the morning As for the wee drummer, we rifled his pow And made a football of his row-do-dow-dow Into the tide to rock and to roll And bade it a tedious returnin' And we haven't no money to pay them off in cracks And we paid no respect to the two bloody backs For we lathered them there like a pair of wet sacks And left them for dead in the morning And so to conclude and to finish disputes We obligingly asked if they wanted recruits For we were the lads who would give them hard clouts And bid them look sharp in the morning Oh me and my cousin, one Arthur McBride As we went a walkin' down by the seaside Now mark what followed and what did betide It being on Christmas morning After many years of evolution, Andy Irvine sings the first few verses slightly differently: I had a first cousin called Arthur McBride He and I took a stroll down by the seaside; Seeking good fortune and what might betide It was just as the day was a'dawnin' After restin' we both took a tramp We met Sergeant Harper and Corporal Cramp Besides the wee drummer who beat up the camp With his row-dee-dow-dow in the morning He says my young fellows if you will enlist A guinea you quickly will have in your fist Besides a crown for to kick up the dust And drink the King's health in the morning (The rest is the same)