Expectations

I keep on having this dream where I'm seventeen Slipping through the cafeteria trying not to be seen I see my brother, he's sitting there with some kids He smiles at me and waves, I fake a smile and sit Down at the table, but something's off and I know it 'Cause when I try and say something nobody seems to take notice I kinda like it, but then I start to feel strange Like the time I went on Amazon to buy myself a date When did things get pixelated? I can't keep my concentration I've lost my imagination To such great expectations All the things that I never said They keep crawling back to me All the things that I never did They still haunt me in my dreams All the years I've spent All the lives I've faked Just to keep myself protected From all the things that I never said That I never said That I never said I keep a rolodex inside of my head of All the times I had a chance to just be honest, instead I made a joke to changed the subject because my confidence said "Hey, listen, if you mess this up They're gonna judge you, my friend!" I'm living in a state of pure paralysis, see I like to think, think, think, but my action is weak My interaction is bleak, if life's a herd, I'm a sheep Guess I'm not really that much different than at age seventeen When did things get pixelated? I can't keep my concentration I've lost my imagination To such great expectations All the things that I never said They keep crawling back to me All the things that I never did They still haunt me in my dreams All the years I've spent All the lives I've faked Just to keep myself protected From all the things that I never said That I never said That I never said All of the things we wish we said They drag me down until I'm dead You say the best is yet to come Can anyone figure out what's wrong with us? All the things that I never said They keep crawling back to me All the things that I never did They still haunt me in my dreams All the years I've spent All the lives I've faked Just to keep myself protected From all the things that I never said That I never said That I never said