I'm Not the Type To Sit and Swipe

I want to actually talk Not text half the night A romantic walk Kissing in the moonlight Sifting through profiles Worded so carefully Is this for me? Not likely A photo with a child Indicates you're fatherly A photo with a tourist site So I know you've left the UK You've really thought this through Really imaginative A photo with a drink Makes it clear that you have fun A photo with a friend So I know that you have one And the photo of you looking sporty Well that one's lovely We're looking more outside than in for love Where do we begin? All these apps are really crap I'm not the type to sit and swipe I'm not the type to sit and swipe A photo with fit mates, which one is you? I super-like by mistake Now what do I say? I swiped the wrong way Has my future love slipped away? Oh shit Never gonna get it You liked me I liked you back Don't care about your height I'd rather than you write You're first to say hi Then you don't reply Why? Time-waster We're looking more outside than in for love Where do we begin? All these apps are really crap I'm not the type to sit and swipe I'm not the type to sit and swipe You call me babe And text me your number And a fuzzy photo in your pants Makes me wonder Yeah I feel really special Bet that's not even you You like to play arrogant Hours text-arguing You don't intend to meet me This app is your therapy What's your problem? I don't have time for this We're looking more outside than in for love Where do we begin? All these apps are really crap I'm not the type to sit and swipe I'm not the type to sit and swipe Years in jail Out on remand An ex Escort Orgasms on demand Yeah you're hot But I'm not gonna Don't really trust you It's good way to network Or practice my Italian Is it wrong to date back-to-back To find my Stallion? But this really could have worked out well Never mind We're looking more outside than in for love Where do we begin? All these apps are really crap I'm not the type to sit and swipe I'm not the type to sit and swipe Did this exist in reality? Based on some photos we built up a fantasy We break-up and make-up before we've even met Intensity freaks you so easily Emotional fucktard God this is hard I'm gonna delete this app Then someone different floats by You've were hurt She died Don't know why You're shy Thank you for being that guy Thank you for being that guy I'm not the type to sit and swipe I'm not the type to sit and swipe