I'm lost

You're not what I came to believe that you were

You said you're in love

But you only see

What you allow me to be

Let me pretend that you just didn't say that

We keep pretending constantly

Thought I could twist myself to fit the mold of what you like

And getting your instant gratification was all I'd need

So I built a facade just to catch you

But I don't like who I am when I put it up

A trite semblance of myself that you seem to adore

At this point

I want more

And I thought you would too

But it seems you'll just leave me if I'm honest with you

So I'm lost

You're not what I came to believe that you were

You said you're in love

But you only see

What you allow me to be

Let me pretend that you just didn't say that

Cuz you don't love me the way I want

I know that you praise distinctiveness and authenticity

So why can't I get deep and show you who I really wanna be?

You only love me when I stay the same man

The fake man who just caters to your whims

I wanna feel free to change but I can't if

You lose interest when I show real passion

For stepping out onto fresh paved ground

Breaking old rules and exploring new sounds, oh

I don't want you controlling the bounds of how creative I can be

Attention and respect collide in my mind and I wonder which side matters more

I don't know anymore

All I really want is just to feel my music is getting some respect from those I look up to

But respect can't come unless you catch the public's eye

It's like putting my thoughts in disguise cuz

I might be seen if I'm just riding trends but

I feel the best when I can try to break them and

If I pretend I'm something I'm not

I worry they won't care about anything beyond that facade

I'm lost

You're not what I came to believe that you were

You might say you're in love

But you'll only see

What you'll allow me to be

So I just need to work

I don't to think about every little fear

Where's the line between what you call unique and just plain weird?

I don't know what to do, cuz I need you to say you love me

But I need to be free

Of what you allow me to be