album cover
G.A.P.
Hip-Hop/Rap
G.A.P. was released on December 16, 2022 by sad boi records as a part of the album Entropy
album cover
AlbumEntropy
Release DateDecember 16, 2022
Labelsad boi records
LanguageEnglish
Melodicness
Acousticness
Valence
Danceability
Energy
BPM

Credits

COMPOSITION & LYRICS
Matthew Newport
Matthew Newport
Songwriter

Lyrics

I just witnessed my first graduation
Eighteen, A drop out of college
Used to long and wait to walk the stage
But all of those days had passed
And I got my paper
Holding it up high in detention
I got no celebration
Patiently wait for the day to end
But it stretches greater
A large party
Because this day needs more commemoration
And I can hardly
Hold in my envy with the whole occasion
My vision starry
I'm still exhausted from yesterday's shift
And all today has been is a flex on my lack of parenting
I got it
Be ashamed that nobody stayed to claim me
And let's be honest
Even with parents I would be disgraceful
Genetic mental illnesses
That would still come deface me
'Cause I'm the problem
And if I wasn't my mom would've stayed
Protect her child
Also my father may never have raped
I'm in denial
One of these days imma waltz to my grave
'Cause all my mother and father have done
Is hand me all their pain
The hole that my parents dug
Is underneath of my feet
I see no reason to leave it
As I'll never be free
Psycho analyzed by everyone
But never by me
That's why it took so long
To see it was poor parenting
When I was in preschool
My momma told me to be a man
Walk up to any girl I liked
And rip off her fucking pants and fuck a bit
I was a toddler I didn't understand what all that meant
They pull up pornos and grab my stuffed gorilla
Told me reenact what I see with accuracy
Or they'll see with certainty that I'm aborted post maturely
So I strip
And do the deed on a plushie monkey
In front of my family who critiquing everything I do
Complement moves
Until they lose their patience
Tell me to stop
'Cause ain't no pussy gon' be pleased
If I keep breathing so hard
They blow smoke in my face
And give me my breathing tank turn it on
Clear my lungs
I'm distraught
Many more times I'm forced to fuck and they'd watch
And they'd drink
And they'd all pressure me
To enjoy it and move it forward to school
Fuck Kaylee
To indulge fantasies
That they've all made for me
All adults tryna take two four year olds virginity
Where's their soul
The hole that my parents dug
Is underneath of my feet
I see no reason to leave it
As I'll never be free
Psycho analyzed by everyone
But never by me
That's why it took so long
To see it was poor parenting
My life has only begun
Though I'm 'bout to be nineteen
Institutionalized all adolescence
Forced on me
Through countless therapists
Digging at every trauma piece
And I never told 'em a word
Of my poor parenting
And to my father you're part
Of the problem too you knew
She was underage and you still
Decided to do what you did
Got yourself on a registry
Age twenty-six and by choosing
That path of pussy you never
Could keep your kid you knew it
So don't you call and say you're
Proud of me like you deserve a
Piece of the pie when my life was
Never a concern to you was it
Was occupied between the
Thighs of a minor denying
Your child a father figure
Riding vagina so fuck you
Cause you and momma put your
Problems on me when you left
Another child abused
And left to die by their selves
Thanks to you I'll never be
Fine in this life til it ends
Suicidal everynight
I gotta fight it again
The hole that you two had dug
Is underneath of my feet
I see no reason to leave it
As I'll never be free
Psychoanalyzed by everyone
But never by me
That's why it took so long to
See it was your parenting
Written by: Matthew Newport
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