Long ago, in a far away land... There lived a dashing rake of ill rebute. Everyone asked how he wooed the maidens... but nobody ever asked why! [Laughter]

Makin' my way through the club tonight

Two drinks in my hand, one thought on my mind

See a PYT by the E-N-Tree

She's gotta be the one to come home with me

He's the man out on attack

The ladies love him, that's a matter of fact

He brings a new one home each time

Who is gonna be his prize?

Won't you please come over tonight?

'Cause there's some ghosts in my motherfuckin' household

Won't you please sleep by my side?

'Cause I don't wanna be alone in my home

Come with me, girl, don't be shy

This is why I bring a lady home each night

I don't even want to have sex

Just take me from these funky spirits!

Now we're at the crib and it's gettin' spooky

Lotsa ghosts, spooky, spooky

Wooden cross, salt circle, holy waters

Book o' spells, sage, someone's daughter

"If this place is haunted, why don't you leave?"

'Cause still I got a few months left on the lease

"Couldn't we have just gone back to my place?"

Aw, shit! Wait-- FUCK!

Won't you please come over tonight?

There's some ghosts in my motherfuckin' household

Won't you please sleep by my side?

I don't wanna be alone in my home

Come with me, girl, don't be shy

This is why I bring a lady home each night

We could even try to have sex

But the ghosts just float and watch