Fate

I'm getting sick of all this wonder My mind's a fucking cloud You hit the crackling of thunder I wanna say I'm proud, but I lie again, I don't want to I see myself as trapped, shit, I wonder what life has come to I'm making all these raps, tryna figure out what's to go to I'm looking at the past, I'm not proud of the things I go through I don't think that I'll last, but I'll try my best just to stay true I'm making myself mad, and I hate the fact that I'm this way I hate to hurt a person just because I'm feeling this way So I just push the people I don't know away from my space I don't think I deserve it, all the love they have for my sake And plus I'm fucking scared, I wanna make sure that my heart's safe I feel so fucking selfish just to think of me and only me I try to hide this shit, but I don't know if I can be discreet I put my life in easy mode and live the shit the hardest way I wanna find some peace, but I don't think that I can find the way Living just to die, but I forgot that I live every day Tryna pave a path, but there is darkness trapped in every way Don't know where I'm going, but I hope it's good for fucking sake So willing to die, but not to suffer, but is that okay Is this what I wanted, what's the journey that I'll fucking take I know I'm getting strong, but I don't know how much that I can take I'm falling to the floor with all the dreams and goals that I would make I'm putting myself last, because I know that soon I'll fucking break