All my friends are happy and healthy and well-adjusted
So when Chris took shots of vodka, he looked disgusted (oh, he looked)
And that's why Blake's at UPS and Logan busses, oh
Oh, all my friends are happy and healthy and well-adjusted
(Fuckin' A)
I watch Naruto on my ex-girlfriend's Netflix
When I have casual sex, I wear my grandma's necklace
Another notch on my belt, cross off my father's checklist
I don't wake up at all, I just eat my breakfast
What the fuck do you think? Way too loud
You're playing the base, the pool water is vibrating
You guys made fun of my fucking wife
It's not cool
All my friends are happy and healthy and well-adjusted
Look how Ryan's full-time offer was interrupted
And I know Taylor dated Matt, we don't discuss it
She don't owe me a thing
Oh, all my friends are happy and healthy and well-adjusted
So can you tell me why
I watch Naruto on my ex-girlfriend's Netflix?
When I have casual sex, I wear my grandma's necklace
Another notch on my belt, cross off my father's checklist
I don't wake up at all, I just eat my breakfast
All my friends are happy and healthy and well-adjusted
