I Wonder

Oh yeah, I've never been real good at lettin' go of the past But I've always been good at fuckin' up when I'm mad And even when they do me dirty, I still wanna go back Because I let this life convince me that I'm nothin' but trash I'm scared of change, even though I've always had to adapt Not to be sad, but I bet I got my holes in my back From people that say they love me, then they leavin' me stabbed And then they wanna look confused when I act how they act I wonder where I'll be when I'm forty Will I have a bunch of people to adore me Will I still be exploring, looking for people for me Will I still be alone Will I still be chasing dreams while I'm running from home Oh, will this dream take me somewhere I live on the road And now I live to please people that won't leave me alone And if I ever live to see sixty Wonder if I ever got to live my big dreams Wonder if I still got friends with me Wonder if my heart's still empty Wonder if I fall in love and it don't leave me broken And I got some satisfaction from the path that I've chosen I wonder if I ever got to buy my momma that house And I make sure that everyone that I love don't go without Yeah, I wonder Yeah, I wonder Yeah, I wonder Oh yeah, I wonder where I'll be when I'm forty Will I have a bunch of people to adore me Will I still be exploring, looking for people for me And if I ever live to see sixty Wonder if I ever got to live my big dreams Wonder if I still got friends with me Wonder if my heart's still empty I'd be a liar if I said I knew the answer Don't know the future and that's something I can't handle It drives me nuts not to know the fucking outcome Of this dream and that's something I can't outrun Do I give up today? I don't think that would help Counterproductive and destructive to myself The only reason that I'm doing this music for mental health And if I didn't, I don't think I'd survive this living hell I wonder where I'll be when I'm forty Will I have a bunch of people to adore me Will I still be exploring, looking for people for me And if I ever live to see sixty Wonder if I ever got to live my big dreams Wonder if I still got friends with me Wonder if my heart's still empty Yeah, I wonder Yeah, I wonder Hmm Oh yeah, I wonder I wonder where I'll be when I'm forty Will I have a bunch of people to adore me Will I still be exploring, looking for people for me And if I ever live to see sixty Wonder if I ever got to live my big dreams Wonder if I still got friends with me Wonder if my heart's still empty