How Could I

How could I, how could I, how could I Have wasted all that, all that I have spent When I have, when I have, when I have Been living on a life that's been lent Their names coat the bathtub Their echoes fill the drawers I don't think there is much left for me to love anymore How could I, how could I, how could I You tell me How I tell you such beautiful stories And I want to rip apart your grin But instead I just curl up my knuckles and wait I'll never have a child, no I'll never have a child I don't trust any chin that's been, that's been born innocent But if I were to, if I were to hold their hand I'm not so sure I'd find a difference in our skin But I am hit and burn and carve and slap and scrape How could they know, they wouldn't know how pain can make a cave In you You tell me How gentle I can be How do I say my softness is just rage contained? So I just smile and I thank you for the compliment Can't you hear them singing? They've left this world and left behind this ringing I block my ears, they bind my eyes And tell me that they're never leaving What can I do to make you all go away? They say you are in us as much they are in me Bloodline, blood let, oh let me let this go and they say no They say no I sit you down, untie my tongue And tell you how it feels To be just an echo In a cave that will never heal You hold in your two hands What you don't know how to say It's alright, I didn't expect an answer anyways But then you Take me to your silence And for a moment things seem to slow But I know Your eyes will never meet the hollows in mine