Burdening

Ivy chokes her throat

Yet no noise escapes her lips

Her tears grow poison oak

So she builds a moat and won't let anyone in

Crying out; nothing's heard

Sympathy is felt; nothing's assured

Hold him close; nothing's felt

Smiling but nothing's well

I can't be who I want you to see

Nor am I the girl you'd like in place of me

Drained and aching as I learn to sing

Instead of asking for help again and burdening

I'm not afraid of sadness

But I am afraid of joy

For every good thing that I'm granted

Something else is destroyed

Breaking down

Seeping in

Hiding sound under my skin

Faking purpose to seem alright

Even when I'm not alright

I can't be who I want you to see

Nor am I the girl you'd like in place of me

Drained and aching as I learn to sing

Instead of asking for help again and burdening