You know I flew here, how come the first class people just

They can just get on whenever they want, I've always hated that

First class people bored at your leisure

Take your time first class people

Coach people no wait sit sit scuzz

Wait little piggies

So when you do get on, the first class people, they're already sitting there

They're all sprawled out in their big thrones

Bring me the head of a pig

And a goblet of something cool and refreshing

Anyone have a fiddle?

Make someone from Coach fiddle for him

Amuse me

They have fiddles in the overhead racks out there

You're not allowed to even use their bathrooms

The bathrooms up front are for our first class passengers

The coach bathrooms are located at Newyork Airport, Concourse C, Concourse C ladies and gentlemen

So when you do board, the first class people, they're sitting there

A lot of them are working as you're boarding

They have computers out with calculators

They're looking up at you like, "Hey, we're making money right now

Right now we're making money

Go get in the back

Close that curtain

I don't want to see you even in my peripheral

Snap it, snap it shut"

What's the matter with us? They gotta cover us up with a tarp

You go in the back, everybody has colouring books on

Hey, come here, where were you?

Where was you at?

You're in the middle and there's nine of us and you're in the middle

And we have all the arm rests and you gotta sit like this

You gotta figure out a way to eat your snack while your elbows are touching

You gotta learn how to twist your little plastic utensil

I like to sit way in the back, way in the back, except for one thing, all the good meals run out, you know?

You're poking your head out from row 199

The flight attendants are this big

You can hear the good meals getting snagged

We have a turkey sandwich, a chicken quesadilla and a cold fish head, I'm just, hmmm

Wonder what I'm gonna get

So when they get to the back of the plane, they have to do that flight attendant psychology game and pretend like the good stuff never even existed

It never even was

Would you like a nice cold fish head? Their frozen solid, frozen head of fish

The eyeballs in there and the skeletons coming out

It comes with a turnip and a spork

I was wishing you'd have one of them left, wishing upon a star