One, two, three, four

You know what you are?

A pizza poser, fuck you

I've never seen you eat a slice

To you it's just a trend, pizza is my life

(Pizza is my life)

Thin crust deep dish double pepperoni

Elios stuffed crust, no anchovies

Pizza Rolls, Bagel Bites, cheesy crust is what I like

Put it in the oven, we can order delivery

I don't care, I'm not very picky

Warm and delicious, spicy, sticky

Cut in to eight squares or triangles

All I really want is pizza in me

Pizza is the greatest food in earth

Well, shit

I got drunk with Papa John

He snorted cocaine with his apron on

He got too fucked up for delivery

It was over thirty minutes so my pizza was free

Oh!

(P-I-Z-Z-A)

(P-I-Z-Z-A)

Yo, dude, go get the door, it's the pizza guy

Ooh, you got any money on this one?

Yeah, here's a five

What up, man? Give me that shit, keep the change, get out of here

Haha, yo, hurry, bring that shit over here

What'd you put on it? The good stuff? (Yo, you–you pumped?)

I got the best stuff man, feast your eyes

Dude, are you fucking kidding me? Pineapple on the whole fucking pizza?

Yeah?

Are you shitting me?

No?

Fucking pineapple? Ruah

Pineapple doesn't belong on pizza

You fucking piece of shit

Why would you do this to me?

Dude, chill, you can peel off the pineapple

No!

I'm gonna peel your eyes out of your fucking skull

I will extract your blood, use it as pizza sauce