Holding onto what is left for me

The lights slowly escapes the room

The flashing memories are leading me to doom

I've tried I swear that I've tried

To erase these bitter memories

Looking back I've seen the truth

I'm so badly broken!

This fucking emptiness

Have swallowed me whole!

Shit! Where will I go?

Knowing that I'm a lost hope!

Where will I go?

Can I be dreaming?

I feel like something is missing

And I can't help myself from screaming

These memories just keep on haunting me

And no matter how hard I've tried

They keep on haunting me

It's been years I live without the one thing that used to lift my heart up, I carry on and on in these lonely years without a peaceful view of your face, given up on the one feeling that I've always thought it's not real, cause I remember, I remember that it all started as a glass of water mixed with a cold temperature that it turned into a solid ice

And I let it broken in pieces, I let it broken in pieces before I threw all the shards away and let them melt down till I could not mend it back together

It's pathetic I know, to waste it all away and live with regret and finding regret in those memories I tried to forget, I know it's pathetic

So here I am holding onto what is left for me, holding onto a broken hope swallowing every pain that I hoped I could endure then watching you reaching for his hands in a white dress along with the crowds throwing smile at you both, I couldn't do anything, like I was turned into a stone with my mind intact and talking to myself-Oh my god what have I done, how did I get myself into all this, how did I wasted it all away, maybe I should've guessed it from the start that this is what I deserved, I've hurt you and you've hurt me, it's what I deserve

Can I be dreaming?

I feel like something is missing

And I can't help myself from screaming