TUSCON, AZ

What's it gonna take for me to change?

I done lost everybody that I had back in the day

Wicked ways, mom's telling me to pray, but I'm ashamed

To stop the pain I'll put a bullet through my brain

Looked her in the face and pulled the trigger, but it skipped one

Figured I was here for a reason, so let me pick some

The devil's talking to me, but I told the Lord I'm his son

Said he couldn't tell because of my sinful addiction

It's got a hold of me, controlling slowly, can't go to sleep

I sold my soul for cheap, no receipts, so I'm sulking hopelessly

You see, I wasn't supposed to make it past that 25

Wasting my potential, telling lies is all I do, right?

Running out of time,

Finish line in my mind keeps getting further

Vivid memories unheard of

Shepherd's son with no converter

Self-loathing, no self-control, often leading to self-murder

So if you see tell her I never meant to hurt her

I'm sorry

And other words I've said too often

Caught up in my web, I felt lost then

So imagine now, still picking up pieces that cut me years ago

Never fully healed, shed tears I should've dropped years ago

No even flow, I rest my head on pillows of concrete

Made too many turns down wrong streets

All of my dirty laundry is out on La Brea, you wanna take a look?

Rip another page from my open book, I'm supposed to cook

Cause therapy never worked and nobody listens anyway

So all the fucked up shit in my mental

I got the nerve to say is getting heard today

God never responded when I pray

So I'm holding up both my middle fingers high until they murder me

I'm so ashamed, wanna slice my veins and bleed for the broken

Played with emotions, yet I'm still hoping that her arms will be open

When I come back a better man

Fuck it, I won't come back at all

Shots heard down the hall where I battle withdrawls

Body sprawled on the floor of dirty bathroom stall

No more filling the void, I'll enter it

And if I said it, I fucking meant this shit

So when you think about me, baby, don't forget the good times

I know the bad outweighs it all, I'm walking over thin lines

Told you that I've been fine, but I've been lying

Karma's coming back around, I think it's fucking time I finally get mine