quarters (feat. Mia Pak)

In my grandparents' town

Every summer there came a carnival

For the Festival of Fish

My sister and I would eat fried cod and french fries with vinegar

Throwing ping pong balls in goldfish bowls

And flying through the sky on jankity rides

Step right up to the House of Mirrors

Ride the death-defying Matterhorn

And of course, hitting the arcade

This one time,

When I was 11

My grandma gave me

A roll of quarters

She was a little bit crazy 'bout coins

Grandpa had his woodshed and grandma had her coins

She'd sit at the dining room table with huge plastic cheese puff tubs

Spilling out with coins

Collecting state quarters

And checking the years on her pennies

And don't go wasting it all on video games Sadie.

I won't grandpa

And I meant it; I wanted to save it for something special

So when we went to the arcade

I said, one game of Ms. Pac-Man, and that's it

But this time they had a row of those machines

Where you put in a quarter

And it rolls down a little slide

And lands in front of a little pushing machine

That pushes everything to the edge

Come try your hand at the Coin Pusher

Fortune and delight await

Quarters, prizes, treats, dollars

So many quarters

And they're all right there

On a razor's edge

Just about to

Just about to fall

And if something falls

You win it.

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

Nothing falls

Nothing falls

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

Nothing falls

Nothing falls

I could see that if I kept pouring quarters in

I could win

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

2 quarters fall

Okay

3 in

2 out

1 down

Stick around

One might fall

One might fall

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

Nothing falls

Nothing falls

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

2 quarters fall

Okay

5 in

3 out

2 down

Stick around

One might fall

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

Nothing falls

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

1 quarter falls

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

Nothing falls

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

3 quarters fall

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

Nothing falls

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

3 quarters fall

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

2 quarters fall

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

Nothing falls

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

Nothing falls

Quarter in

Roll

Clink

Push push push push push push

Push push

Until all 40 quarters

Were gone

Just…gone

I held the empty orange wrapper in my hands

Torn in a spiral

What happened?

Where did I go?