Life flashes before my eyes

Doing my part but I'm too smart

To be acting this dumb

I just hope she know

She was never under my thumb

I appreciate every smile

Like those cheeze-it crumbs

Every word

Ring through me brighter

Than the ring I wanted on her finger

Remember I make music

And look at the bigger picture

Mixture of understanding

As I read the scripture

The devil in me knows

How to get richer

Swallow my light in sips

Through a pitcher

Saving my energy for every inning Because we don't got a backup

I don't think my answers

Can be solved with a check up

Can't get passed being a mess up

I shut the fuck up

And maybe that's my issue

Too much trauma conditioning

Sometimes they want you to

Speak up first

And sometimes they want you to Just listen

I don't know my problem

Tried whistling

That even took a couple tries

Still can't do it but I'm glad

I fixed the bass line

I shine through all my flaws

Getting the job done

Forget I'm human

And how to have fun

All the thoughts flood

For her to choose another one

Remedied by empathic intuition

Still the thoughts of being a rapper And make someone think

Maybe he not rhyming about it Because he don't got it

Walking life's path

For the psychotic synchronicities

Haven't been wrong often and Maybe that's why

They put faith in me

Fill their plates with brain food

And I can redeem

My personal loss of hope

Living anyway

Pretty dope

But it's harder to cope

Than downing soap

Rather just not swear

Til I'm allowed to

Stutter is how I got through

Funny asf and true

Still stupid with word choice

As in they might just not come up

So when I look back into your eyes

It can come up

But sometimes it's stuff we can't say

Would probably question

The validity of it anyway

Still love our relay

And I wish I thought about more Than jumping into the freeway When crossing the bridge

I don't know why

I have a tendency to burn my own

Even with friends

Growth learned through a phoenix

Some made of stone and not many Of those have had visitors

Stopped waiting at the opening

Realized this what they doing

And I didn't hold hope in them

Always ready for them to come back

Even if only for a quick chat

It's stupid to be alice as a cat

But my head fit through anyway

It's not some place I'd like to stay But it's a fun place to play

As I lay with Chester

Thank him for showing me the way

He told me I did it on my own

And faded away

Left

And now I don't know what to say

I make it through each day

By being present

Some how I still haven't put a dent

In being my own controller

Grew up with many in my hand

But soon I dropped it

So I could hold her

Always do a good enough job

I can pick it up again

I woulda never done so if I knew What went through her head

She player two and we both dead

Banged heads and we went into a tree

Fate or miscalculation is something

I couldn't see

As my speaker

Kept playing in the back seat

They told me we shoulda died

Fine driving

But my injuries ain't worth it to hide

Wanted to make sure she was okay Despite how many fines I get

Told I could skip that part

His anxiety should make him set

Woke up outta death

And yet I still fall back to old ways

Only doing so much every day

It's okay I say as I keep going

Knowing I want it to all end

Unless the reason is in my hands

And I transcend past faults

Personalities mix like malt

Will I be happier

Or will you not like the salt

I think you would have

Loved my face to see it everyday And that alone could fix me

Speaking like this

Is the real downfall

And you will always be a queen

Gotta lift that head

To wear the crown

Might just decide

To glue it to my frown

I've Been down and I found ground

Bedrock as I lay to rest

And blanketed with regret

Because I forget the future isn't set

I just let it flood in

I don't got a door as I stand straight

I don't believe there's a floor

Welcome to my mind

My core

I want to make you happy

And I think we can soar at that goal

Takes communication

Because I never feel whole

Soul take it's place

And it's just a vessel to place

No matter if I'm here or not

Vocal solidification to

What I think

Is important enough

I hand her a cup and pore

Doesn't ask what it is

As we can both see

The liquid implore

I'd like to explore your ways

Without you days are a waste

But I don't know what you faced

I just know you right in every debate And your presence helps me

Not contemplate

I try to concentrate on the problems I get paid to fix

Wish we could just move in together And dip into what it would be

Both of us too old for the shit Women do in their teens

I know many fiends that seem to

Get what they want regardless

You deserve it

And I don't want to know

What you like heartless

Open my lock and key compartment And wish we never have to find out

I'm not all a waste

My luck is just usually south of

What I'd like it to be

Intuition breaks me free

But I'm still stupid and

Filled with uncertainty

I don't know if you hurting me

Or I'm hurting you

I think we just wounded hearts

That are trying to decide

If it's worth merging

I'll always love you but I'd be lying

If I said I don't feel it for anyone

My past of good tells

You different and I'm stuck in hell

I'd rather give you a bell to tell me When I'm doing something wrong Than go along assuming

Consuming a lot as I realize

I'm missing in the plot

I ring the slot and get all 7's

Forget to collect the money

And run to heaven

I finally learned my lesson

No one will do it for you and

I'm pre-occupied trying to do Generational ascension

Willing to put it off to

Give you attention

Not understanding

It's a two way street to progression

Feel my emotions compress

And know I have to get over

The humps myself

Because a nicer hand was dealt

I wish that for all of you

Take every shitty card

So you don't have to

At least by the time we get to go-fish

I'll have an easy win

Joker end

Tell me that's not in the rules

No more cards to play and I forget Why we were even playing

Get up and start slaying

Those praying in the shadows

Gods sword as I'm

The new appointed commando

Wings as sharp as a razor

And light as dense as a beam

See the eyes I avoided and know

It'll never be a dream

I got prophetic themes

Because it seems everyone else

Is just looking around

I don't even see the crowd

One day this blackness

Will hold white clouds

Die a billion times and figure out

What I'm about

Sit on the throne and

Wait for the seat next to it

To be taken

Know I met her on earth

And our Idents aren't shaken

Spend my living days awakening Fuck words they be using

For labeling

Just enabling a vocal picture

Sit for millennia knowing I miss her

Knowing the physical is

Where I meet to kiss her

And death pisses her off

more than one can fathom

I'm just tired beyond Belief

And if I don't do enough

The feelings sadden

Beat flatten and I know I don't know What's happening

Physical brain rationing isn't shit to What's at play but I still feel safe Calling it quits because

Although It wasn't enough

I did more than most

Sorry for being a shit host

I hope life coasts

At whatever pace you like

It's okay if you don't wave as

The dust covers my figure as I go Back to light

I know you right

How many times would I have to cry When we fight for you to see me

As less than a man for

At least the night

I think I'd be fine but

Straightening my spine

Takes more than a day

I love you and I wish to stay

I don't know what to say

And I pray I figure it out

Death still present and I do believe It's better if your heart

Never finds out

If it ends up broken regardless

I got other people who break mine For fun

I'd make it whole again

Before handing it over

It just doesn't seem

Worth it beforehand due to

Being a soldier

The front line gets closer and

I had closure

Keep my composure and

Fight for freedom

Every day isn't lived without reason

I wish it to be you

But maybe you'll care enough

To the see the contradictions

You might already believe to be true