album cover
Three Legged Cat
61
Comedy
Three Legged Cat was released on August 4, 2009 by Comedy Central Records, under exclusive license to 800 Pound Gorilla Records as a part of the album Unbalanced Load
album cover
Release DateAugust 4, 2009
LabelComedy Central Records, under exclusive license to 800 Pound Gorilla Records
LanguageEnglish
Melodicness
Acousticness
Valence
Danceability
Energy
BPM

Music Video

Music Video

Credits

PERFORMING ARTISTS
Doug Benson
Doug Benson
Spoken Word
COMPOSITION & LYRICS
Doug Benson
Doug Benson
Songwriter
PRODUCTION & ENGINEERING
Doug Benson
Doug Benson
Producer

Lyrics

I'm always saying the wrong thing, like one time a woman comes up to
Me and she goes, in a very proud manner, she says, "I have a three-
Legged cat!" And I was like, "So? Big deal. Most cats have three legs
When you think about it." Right? Cats with four legs have three legs
Plus one more leg. Cats with three legs have three legs. The only
Cats that don't have three legs are the ones with two through zero
Legs, and when do you see them out and about? Never. Unless they've
Got, like, a butt cart or something. Or a cart butt. You can switch
Those two words around, they still essentially mean the same thing
Cart butt, butt cart. It's like tugboat, boat tug. Foot big, big
Foot. I'm obsessed with Bigfoot, you guys. Yeah, I love Bigfoot
I think there should be a Bigfoot channel on cable. There's a
Channel devoted to golf and a channel for being gay, why not a
Bigfoot channel? And it could be 24/7, they could show "Harry and
The Hendersons," they could show blurry photographs. But here's the
Best reason to have a Bigfoot channel: I've already thought of the
Slogan for the Bigfoot channel. Yeah, the slogan for the Bigfoot
Channel could be "Squatch what happens." Squatch it! Squatch and
Learn! You could do a tie-in with Swatch and everybody could be
Wearing Squatch watches. Squatch, Swatch. Squatch, Swatch. Squatch
Squatch. I'm always coming up with slogans for companies and then
Not sharing them with them because my slogans are too awesome. Like
You know that supermarket chain Whole Foods? I came up with a great
Slogan for them. "Whole Foods: for your food whole." Boom! Banking
Is scary right now, so I came up with a new slogan for Bank of
America that reflects the scariness
Of the times. "B of A: be very of A."
Written by: Doug Benson
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