album cover
Plano Joe
17
Comedy
Plano Joe was released on January 1, 1995 by Olympia Records as a part of the album Shore Lines
album cover
Release DateJanuary 1, 1995
LabelOlympia Records
LanguageEnglish
Melodicness
Acousticness
Valence
Danceability
Energy
BPM

Music Video

Music Video

Credits

Lyrics

He had long green moss growing on his back
And it waved in the water when he'd swim
He had notches all along from his head to his tail
Where the motor of a boat dug in
He had a half a dozen hooks hanging from his lips
All rusted, busted and bent
He had one big bloodshot eye on the right
And on the left side, nothing but a dent
Now I'm a pretty good fisherman, but plain ol' Joe, he's great
He knows all there is to know about boats and bass and bait
He'll catch more on just one cast than most men catch all day
To plain ol' Joe there ain't no such thing as the one that got away
Now plain ol' Joe's from Texas, where everything comes big
Where the bass are as mean as rattlesnakes and outweigh most any pig
You can't catch a smallmouth if it's largemouth bait you use
Cause them bass they ain't just big
And mean, but they all got high IQs
Now up in Lake Texoma, there lives a striper, his name is Jake
Everyone down in Texas knows that's the biggest fish in the lake
He'd never been caught but he'd been seen by all the local pros
Swimming round the bass boats thumbing his big bass nose
He had long green moss growing on his back
And it waved in the water when he'd swim
He had notches all along from his head to his tail
Where the motor of a boat dug in
He had a half a dozen hooks hanging from his lips
All rusted, busted and bent
He had one big bloodshot eye on the right
And on the left side, nothing but a dent
Plain ol' Joe was on the lake around sunrise, sixth of June
In his box he had just one lure, a spinner with a silver spoon
He had just one rod and just one reel and just one great big lake
"Today's the day," I heard him say, "
I'm gonna boat that fish named Jake."
He cruised out Ross's Cove and headed down lake to the dam
And just beyond old Walker's Point he said, "Jake, here I am."
He shut that outboard motor down, took out that silver lure
Tied it to some heavy line, and he cast out strong and sure
Now I've known Joe for forty years, maybe even more
But when that fish hit, his blue eyes lit like I'd never seen before
That line went tight, that pole went bent, that drag began to spin
There was smoke rolling out the back of
His reel when his line jerked to an end
Then the fish began to tow the boat so fast it left a wake
Joe said, "I'm gonna beat this bass
If my back and my line don't break."
And as he zoomed off across the lake, he said, "You can tell my wife
I've been home every night for twenty-
Nine years, but I won't be home tonight."
After forty days of fighting, that fish could barely swim
After twenty more days of playing tug of war, Joe started reeling in
After ten more days of reeling, Joe was eye to eye with Jake
He said, "Tell me now, you water sow, who's the baddest in this lake?"
Then Jake spit out that silver lure right back into old Joe's face
Started dancing on his tail like a theme park wheel
Splashing water all over the place
Well Joe ripped off his hat and his
Shoes and he said, "Hooks be damned!
Forget that rod, forget that reel, I'm gonna get this fish by hand."
With that, old Joe jumped in the lake and he swam out to that fish
He grabbed his tail, but Jake shook loose with one big mighty swish
Then Jake grabbed Joe by his sleeve and drug him down below
The water did boil and bubble and blither
Didn't see them for an hour or so
Then up they shot like a waterspout about a hundred feet in the air
They were flipping and spinning and flapping and slapping
And scales flying every which way
They thrashed and they splashed till the sun started setting
And when the water finally stills
Here comes old Joe swimming lifeguard style
Hauling Jake in by the gills
And he was singing to him
"You got long green moss growing on your back
And it waves in the water when you swim
Notches all along from your head to your tail
Where the motor of a boat dug in
You got hooks in your lips and a bloodshot eye
But hey Jake, it wasn't your day
Cause to plain ol' Joe there ain't no such thing
As the one that got away."
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