Just Rob Me

One, two, one two three four I met a pretty girl the next town over Running like a river, thin and long Other than her dress, she looked mighty well depressed So I asked this pretty lady what was wrong She said, "All my life I tried to be an outlaw I've tried to spit and chew and steal and rob But I ain't no good at thievin' So I might as well be leavin' I think I'm off to go and get a job" I told that pretty girl, "Don't be so foolish Don't be so quick to leave this life of crime Now see, I'll be quick to call it You can practice on my wallet And that way if you're caught, you won't do time" Yeah, just rob me Just rob me A pretty face like yours don't come for free If I can call you honey Well, then you can take my money Oh, darlin' keep my gun and just rob me Yeah, just rob Sean Watkins So I saw this girl again a few months later To see her with my gun was a relief I said, "Honey, you got attributes Like lace and lips and high-heeled boots But dear, you're just no good at it as a thief" She said, "Mister, how do you know that I'm failin'? I might as well rob twenty banks today" Yeah, so I looked into her eye And I said "Dear, I'd be surprised You're pointing that there gun the wrong way" Yeah, just rob me Just rob me Oh, money never did grow up on trees "Oh, you're no good at crookin' But you're mighty fine at lookin'" Darlin', keep my gun and just rob me, yeah Oh, maybe every woman is an outlaw I'm pretty sure they're pretty thieves in black They'll make you scream like smoke And then they'll rob you broke I suppose you don't mind being robbed like that So, my pretty thief and I started a family My outlaw's been givin' me in-laws Oh, she kept her thievin' art And sure as rain, she stole my heart She tells me it's all for a worthy cause Yeah, just rob me! Just rob me! Deep down my darlin' is a thief Oh, she may do the dishes But I pay her for my kisses I know it's not malicious She's just in the thievin' business She calls herself my Misses But she's got me by the britches I say honey, keep my gun and just rob me