Poop in My Fingernails

You know, I wipe really hard And my toilet paper is weak Sometimes I break right through and my fingernail is rubbing Up against my poopy butt-cheek And I am completely unaware Of what's goin' on down there Until I pull my finger out of my butt and I stare at Poop in my fingernails Poop in my fingernails Poop, poop, poop in my fingernails Poop in my fingernails Poop in my fingernails Poop in my fingernails When the toilet paper breaks There is nothing left standing in between Poop and your fingernails And you're never truly gonna get it completely clean Poop in my fingernails Poop in my fingernails Everytime I try to clean it up I fail Never ever, ever, ever gonna win Because the fecal matter is hiding deep down where the nail meets the skin In my fingernails poop in my fingernails Tried the clipper, tried the brush Scrub a dub, scrub a dub-dub But you're only going to get so much When the toilet paper breaks There's nothing left standing in between Poop and your fingernails And you're never truly gonna get them completely clean If you want the cleanliness of your fingernails to improve Go down to the nail salon and ask them if they'll remove Every one of your fingernails I know, I know it might seem extreme But I'm tellin' you that's the only way that They're ever gonna be completely clean