Found another one this morning. Right at the temple. Thought it was a trick of the bathroom light. It wasn't a trick. The light isn't lying, you're just 35

I'm checking my health bar in the bathroom's fluorescent hum

Another silver medal, another silver sign of what I've become

They said with age comes wisdom and a new perspective

But comments on my hair just became super effective

I used to dye it jet black just to fit into the Hot Topic scene

Now I'm terrified because 10 years ago was 20-fucking-16

All our old MySpace pages are filled with broken, old "HTML"

And every new gray hair reminds me I'm getting old as hell

They said we killed the diamond trade, killed the nine-to-five

And somehow fucking Applebee's still continues to thrive

But nobody ever warned us about the quiet genocide

Of our faded band tees and our fading youthful pride

And I'm just another skeleton turning gray (Oh-fuck)

Scrolling through the wreckage of another wasted day (Fuck-me)

The dial-up generation with no filters on the page

We learned to love the glow and now we're one foot in the grave

Now I can only navigate the panic with a couple stimulants

Caught somewhere in between despair and ambivalence

We didn't have an algorithm, we just had the screaming wild

Where sites like Rotten.com would raise your troubled child

Unmoderated chatrooms and a dial-up modem scream

With nothing to separate the nightmares from the dreams

Now culture lives in a sanitized cocoon

While I'm plucking out the evidence that my own death will be here soon

They said we got the trophy just for showing up to gym

Said we'd change the world as it caved right fucking in

But the realest trauma's in the bathroom sink at 7 AM

When your reflection looks more like your own dad than him

And I'm just another skeleton turning gray (Oh-fuck)

Scrolling through the wreckage of another wasted day (Fuck-me)

The dial-up generation with no filters on the page

We learned to love the glow and now we're one foot in the grave

We were the beta test for the end of the world. A soft launch for dystopia

They handed us a loaded gun with no safety and said "Go make friends."

We saw the decapitations on LiveLeak before we saw our first algebra quiz

We survived the unblinking eye of the Wild West Web just to be terrified of our own hairlines

And I'm just another skeleton turning gray (Oh-fuck)

Scrolling through the wreckage of another wasted day (Fuck-me)

The dial-up generation with no filters on the page

We learned to love the glow and now we're one foot in the grave

I guess I'll leave it there, a little monument to stress

A crown of silver rust upon our parents' second guess

We thought we'd live forever, that we'd never slip away

But everything we loved is fading to the gray